i love you saint swithun you're nothing like the other saints i love you saint swithun it's different this time i love you saint swithun it's not gay 'cause you've been canonized i love you saint swithun & i'm glad that you're mine x ...
Art
upon awakening ken enning
upon awakening ken enning 'come on kenneth, get up' upon awakening ken enning he didn't like that much upon awakening ken enning he punched me with a low blow upon awakening ken enning so i smothered him to death with his own pillow -oh no r.i.p ken enning the end (ing) ...
allium ursinum & thereabouts
it's an overcast sunday let's afternoon stroll along the flat of the valley 'neath the dales as they roll by the banks of the river where the wild garlic grows suitably level but a delight for the nose ...
yadnus retsae
easter sunday is here no tinsle snow or mistletoe but sometimes these things get up-muddled then fuddled easter sunday is here it's the aftermath of christ's prank the annual crucified scamp with an empty tomb for all there to see & a chocolate partridge in a pear tree ...
the truth is stranger
yes the truth is stranger than fiction as in real-life black beauty was a kraken who terrorised the 7 seas with tentacles for centuries anna sewell's an equine wind-up merchant - that's what actually happened ...
multi-mickle-muckle-pile-up
many a little makes a mickle many a mickle makes a muckle many a many a makes a muddle fuddles - quibbles troubles - riddles (?) ...
charity shop man-mannequin
charity shop man-mannequin a penny for your thoughts or failing that i'll buy some geriatric cords in your store all for a good cause ...
everyday’s only a blank page if you dismiss the invisible ink
everyday's only a blank page if you dismiss the invisible ink the scribblings of yesterdays disguised quite indistinct the meanderings of previously the potterings of yore yes everyday's only a blank page if you manage to ignore what's been written before ...
bouquet
this poem smells of the delian league a week last-sunday & cauliflower cheese this poem smells of neptune's moons all 14 of the beggars & confused afternoons this poem smells of your uncle's first car the shipping forecast a candle maker's memoir plus this poem smells of the kitchen sink so when every scent has blended - THIS POEM STINKS ...
my hit list
patrick alternator jonathon crayon anthony histamine patricia liason marianna trenchfoot godfrey guineafowl william abstract-windfarm perrywinkle owl christina chrysanthemum tracheotomy smithe henry spinning jenny alexander tithe simon peter cathode whitstable june-whitbread are imaginary people or soon very dead x ...