she sells sea shells on the sea shore he sells sea shells he sells more so she put a special offer on buy 3 get 4 he retaliated - SEA SHELL WAR ...
Poems
a vanishing act
a gas & lecky sort has just popped 'round to read the meters i asked him 'could you please read my palm while you're here ( ? ) & my latest poem called the elbows of saint peter' ( ? ) he said 'i'm more crystal balls & saint paul' then magically he disappeared ( the end ) ...
( midsummer murmurs )
there are echoes in the hedgerows
of the babbles in the brambles
sticky whispers in the thicket
where the goose grass tangles
as june's a spinning jenny
she's a loom of a loon
halfway up the greasy pole
- a strawberry moon
...
the great wet outdoors
there's spitting & there's rain in the middle there's drizzle sometimes all 3 come at once the skies delight in riddles there's hail, sleet & snow plus every week or so frogs the trick is to be amphibious too all gifts from the gods so crack on through the lot ...
visions of things
i was amble-plodding down a y'oldey wonky lane to my left a field of donkeys in the head an empty brain to my right a field of peas when the visions burst forth yes pods a plenty as a jenny eeyored i saw next ash wednesday it rained around 3ish a ginormous artichoke an otter feeling peevish a baboon in a wedding dress - 2 pixies playing badminton & then shite faded out to nowt - should i inform the vatican ( ? ) ...
on a piss-wet afternoon in june
on a piss-wet afternoon in june i dusted the dusty bits humming some tunes the radetzky march then the theme from pingu on a piss-wet afternoon in june ...
the girl with carrots for fingers
the girl with carrots for fingers had actual carrots for fingers i met her one crunchy candlemas eve hiding in a wood amidst the frosty old trees the girl with carrots for fingers oh how her carrot touch lingers she escaped from a farm-lab then lived on the run a super-hush experiment & potentially; weapon yes the girl with carrots for fingers don't worry - her hair wasn't ginger we spoke of a future her voice was a song but come the yawn of morning-thing that carrot girl had gone ...
when phyllis discovered liquorice tea
when phyllis discovered liquorice tea she thought 'take that pontefract you're the one for me i quite like liquorice - i quite like a brew but why be an either-beaver ( ? ) this here's the power of two ~ sorted' ...
( grab a pew )
mildly unamused libran tree surgeons frenetic phrenologists diabetic numerologists liquid petroleum gasp enthusiasts mesolithic mendicants all creatures great & sentient including honey badgers & the wise bees of finland visigoth staticians then theurgic court magicians plus the inventor of the bidet & the venerable lamashtu - grab a pew ... ( auth' node' reworking of something older p.s i made the wise bees of finland up, i think the rest are all real ... )
campanology?
campanology? now that rings a bell ...
