eeh the cauliflower people well the florety folk yes they're definitely real no it's sadly not a joke 'cause fairly bland vegetable plus some science when it's evil plus the darkest of dark magic = cauliflower people don't talk to them ...
Poem
the great word search 2016
when lost for words when none are there a vacant mouth a tongue that's bare then scour the earth then go in search then climb a tree a silver birch then dredge canals then swim them seas all 6 & 1 where can they be? from pole t' t'other a fruitless ordeal but after all that well, how do you feel ( ? ) ...
with these words
with these words
we say hello
alright? how's shite?
mind how you go
yes happy whitsun
how's your head?
i love you cousin
please drop dead
c'est fantastique
geddoff my land ( ! )
a dash of milk
look - swollen glands
hip hip hooray
what time's the train?
a lovely evening
will it stain?
yes with these words
we say our piece
you've lost the plot
i've lost my sheep
nice mittens
ten pound - on the nose
are faeries real?
where are my clothes?
is tuesday soon?
is thursday far?
good morning curate
let's steal a car
thanks for the eggs
& so much more
with these words of mine
with these words of yours
( x )
...
adverts are dark witchcraft
adverts are dark witchcraft which tinkers with our minds they make us all buy tinsel & thick coats in july then take out goat insurance when we don't own goats adverts are dark witchcraft the magic of promote ( ! ) ...
proper quiz-mad
daytime telly quiz shows you can play along at home just shout out the answers don't cheat - no mobile phones no internet no reference books them's the rules - that's the game but most importantly turn the telly on first or else you're proper quiz-mad insane ...
there’s a book in everyone
they say there's a book in everyone i wonder which book's in me ? hopefully it's one with plenty of pictures stolen from my local library spare us the x-ray - don't ruin these things preserve this mystery the satanic verses though that would keep me on my toes i wonder which book's in me ? ...
obligatory preamble
a wise man once said save the hodgepodge cerebral sheep graze bless the bodge job save the hedgehog lend us a fiver black holes are mysteries scrumpy my cider reality's oblong bring back echoes forget the bloody fire oh blow the bellows summer can do soup too bollocks in motion i hereby declare this fucking poem open ...
for absent poltergeists
in the absence of my poltergeist who used to keep me up with fright quite terrified since gone all shy i gave it a go haunt d.i.y so banged a wall then smashed a plate then had a nap a good 'un - great it's not the same i miss you now sweet poltergeist dear ghostly thou ... ( author nodes; this poem is also dedicated to yvette fielding ... )
sneezing is believing
yes sneezing is believing aye sneezing's real it's true i thought it was all a hoax-joke like blinking until one day - achoo ( ! ) ...
the village of keiths ( ! )
i live in a village where everyone's keith every man, woman & child is called keith keiths build-up like limescale but a secret i keep i'm the only non-keith so i lie ' hi, i'm keith ' ...
resarf poetry 