recently i've not been myself yes far too often i've been someone else all morning i've been mary queen of scots implicated by that bastard babbington plot & if i carry on this gender-bend way no doubt they'll behead me down at fotheringhay yes recently i've not been myself since the others spiked my apple juice - blame everyone else ...
Poetry
if i had a penny …
if i had a penny for every time i lost a penny i'd be loaded with bastard shrapnel pennies many many & if i had a penny for every time i 'spent a penny' i'd sit on my arse & just drink tea my bladder would gradually finance me ...
poetry’s ‘special’
poetry's 'special' & that's why it's essential like a fat man when it really is just glands poetry's 'special' ...
5 a day
pear soap cauliflower ears banana skin skid-marks a pea in a bottle & cherry blossom ...
Summer’s on a ‘special’ register
i fucking love you Summer you are the fucking bestest the chubby sweaty thumbs of your uncle-esque caresses old inhibitions disappear when them sheep get sheared any other season & this would be fucking weird ...
nostalgia
i remember nostalgia that fuzzy warm glow from years ago (it's still there somewhere) ...
i met Spring once
i met Spring once in a model village gift shop the shop was actual size so the whole experience was a massive surprise yes i met Spring once in a model village gift shop looking well yet green he disappeared mid-sentence ne'er again to be seen ...
pun of the mill
how did the beaker people cope without coasters? is anyone more generous than mr a donor? these answers should be served on the finest silver platter 'cause jesus was an octopus & silly thoughts matter ...
fishing for compliments
i was dangling by the riverbank fishing for compliments whilst trying to spot an otter or perchance a hippopotamus the waters flowed all day long like a constant stream of consciousness but all i caught was mustard & chutney - bloody condiments ...
friends in high places
a mate on a hill friends in high places a proper old mucker no airs & graces the higher the better top that if you can (clouds don't count or the abominable snowman) ...
resarf poetry 