Poem

although – a poem

…

although
the butler saw him last
although
it smells of pickled eggs
although
the sun rose quietly
although
the gob nextdoor misheard
although
the dinosaurs got bored
although
the eggless omelette vanished
although
the breeze turned left
although
chest down & stomach full
although
i was only breathing
although
the cloud came running
although
the wing commander fell
although
the post was late again
although
the poet’s plot was lost
although
the skeleton’s key was found
although
this toast is overdone
– although, although, although

…

twaddle blues

…

my baby left me
for an untuned steinway
with no middle c
so now i’m a’drinking
lukewarm horlicks
in this ghostly bungalow
& feeling like the headless
corpse of charles gordon

my sweetheart ran away
with the milkman’s long lost uncle’s
cousin’s best friend’s
labradoodle groomer’s
vivid vignettes of
martians made from marzipan
so now i’m a’licking
the smudgy bathroom mirror

my pet gerbil burst
into a flaming ball of
smokeless plasma
on the feast day of saint elmo
then chartist upstarts
torched me citroën saxo
& my robot boss replaced me
with a sack of winter barley

& my true love legged it
for a tuesday afternoon
in ashby-de-la-zouch
& a signed seven inch
of never gonna give you up
by rick ruddy astley
so now i’m a’combing
my hairy palms alone

( yeah )

…

enter the bellend

…

d is for dunces
donuts & dipsticks

open the green door
let the spring sing

grin like a cheshire
cheesemonger’s moggy

only on the inside
under uncle cumulus

miles of piles above
dim mid-derbyshire

wit’s about turn
is marching further normalz

leaving us pillocks
speaking lamb’s lettuces

enter the bellend
the gone one in we

…