mist opportunities

~

mist opportunities ( seitinutroppo tsim )

~

water vapour wraiths

twist a greyer dragon’s tail

shifting shapes of apes

~

faces frown a smile

when ganesh is speckled breath

sit upon a stile

~

in a sodden lea

seek the greener grails of vales

watch the lottery

~

by the river’s bend

see the milkman floating so

hespero’s a friend

~

tentacles & horns

dancing as the owls retreat

then the morning dawns

~

clouds upon the ground

spinning with the river’s hymn

sing without a sound

aaa ppp rrr iii lll

~

aaa ppp rrr iii lll ( lll iii rrr ppp aaa )

abra-cadaver
arthur wakes on avalon
as pranksters reign

pull the other wool
pass the season’s parcel then
pluck the sparrow’s grass

red tulips whisper
rhubarb rising like a star
roguish crows caw

incas ink a sun
icthyosaurs walk again
in between daydreams

lemurs leap the deep
leopards spot a shepherd’s flock
lazing in the shade

how to kill your imaginary friends ( & get away with it scot-free )

~

how to kill your imaginary friends ( & get away with it scot-free ) ( (eerf-tocs to htiw yawa teg & ) sdneirf yranigami ruoy llik ot woh )

shoot the buggers down
with a gun-shaped hand

with invisible bullets
( sound effects optional )

whack ’em with a spade
from the shed – in y’ head

or a faux-snow shovel
blow upon blow

shrink ’em to the size
of a silverfish or fly

or imaginary ant
& stamp, stamp, stamp

startle them with boos
shock ’em ’til they drop

tickle both their elbows
with an ostrich feather

break their phantom hearts
tell ’em that it’s over

you’ve new fake friends now
& some of them are poets

bury them deep
in a ten foot hole

in the hungry woods at night time
& tell not a soul

( author notes )

& if you have a few spare years to fill

look into the origins of scot-free

there’s quite a few different theories out there

& they’re all adamant they’re right

but until susie dent puts her foot down

no one can say for certain

the twelve daze of easter

~

the twelve daze of easter ( retsae fo ezad evlewt eht )

twelve rabbits at it

crackles in the attic

eleven morris dancers

actual bell ends

ten wrens a’nesting

in a letterbox

nine pheasants strutting

underneath the catkins

eight maids a’milfing

time is speeding up

seven tulips crooning

handel & jerusalem

six snarks a’ larking

where the air is pot pourri

five creme eggs

it’s a chocolate lottery

four orbs soar

as the scarecrows see

three badgers dance

on a moonlit lea

two hot cross buns

plus a game of noughts & crosses

& starship from atlantis

in a pickled pear tree

pea estuary

~

pea estuary ( yautse aep )

i thought i heard a curlew
& then the heavens opened

letters in the post
missives from the messrs

soon is cheesy beans
& lemon fool for pudding

off before it’s on
once upon a turnip

so the weather spins
on an antiquated shilling

see the evening primrose
weeping of morn’

she’s crossing ‘neath the junction
but still the cunts turn in

don’t these gobshites know
the highway fucking code?

a crocus on your pillow
a sweaty yeti drips

the gravy train is late
the bus is on sabbatical

i’ll wait until the hedgehogs
fly like buttered wings

clarinets & catkins
corncrakes & cornflakes

( author notes )

based on a moan
& some random lines i wrote

pardon my language
but pedestrians have right of way

https://www.gov.uk/government/news/the-highway-code-8-changes-you-need-to-know-from-29-january-2022

most cars ignore this
i’ve nearly been mowed over twice
in the last month
& once was by an interlfora van
( name ’em & shame ’em )

p.s

i’m not the she crossing
& i wasn’t thinking of the lady
in the gov.co.uk photo either
as she’s everyone that’s had a brush
with the reaper recently
or something

p.p.s

the picture’s an old list i found
of a wander in a field
– author unknown –

( ? )

once more with fooling

~

once more with fooling ( gniloof htiw erom ecno )

bonce upon a planet egg
nought’s a start – the starlings say

when the zen’s a rubber hen
& the flaming sun is grey

giz a kiss, the finches sing
scribble in a squirrel’s drey

languages in sandwiches
posting on the ess in ay

tripping on banana skins
bee the bumble’s bobbing sleigh

blossom snows, a bottom blows
parping parsnips, copses sway

bollocks is a friend of mine
horses moo ‘n’ bullocks neigh

pickled pepper parallax
captain cabbage cabaret

galaxies in cans of peas
spot the flocks of shepherds stray

life is butter pantomime
spread the bread upon this day

normalzzz is a willing host
as the monkish mantis pray

let the jesters pester you
’til the noon ‘n’ run away