one of those daze

~

one of those daze ( ezad esoht fo eno )

waking the bread, squawking the dog

walking a torque, haunting a bog

cows in the brown, facing the grey

misting the bus, pissing the day

feathers ‘n’ dust, riddling lips

tumbles of tongue, bottles in ships

bugs in the bots, webs in the flies

ebbing a flow, ghosting the skies

toasting the beans, open the end

blur in reverse, foaming a friend

blinking a sea, singing a whale

leaden’s the stead, twisting the tale

scratching a map, gravel in boots

graphing a plot, circular routes

boxing a frog, scallions weep

sleep beneath eyes, eyes above sleep

when every other fucker on earth has a podcast

~

when every other fucker on earth has a podcast ( tsacdop a sah htrae no rekcuf rehto yreve nehw )

when every other fucker
on earth
has a podcast

( so in the next year – or so )

other than i
of the long, quiet plods

wandering yon
in the tumbleweed twilight

roaming the gloaming
the hills are still green

breathing the air
of that phantom land’s there

guided by birdsong
( a map in me ears )

home & a sandwich
a book in the bath

hush
or the others
might interview you

vetted by five eyes
the c.c.p
regressive “progressives”
the p.c brigade
weasels in the small print
digital brains
mutant algorithms
& quantum bots

when every other fucker
on earth
has a podcast

( earthlings are such
an original bunch )

tales from the dales & beyond

~

tales from the dales & beyond ( dnoyeb & selad eht morf selat )

in the land of the ram, in the mizzle ‘n’ fog
in the wank of the damp, in the blood of a bog
is a song t’be sung with a twist of a tongue
with a skip of a hare ‘n’ a hop of a frog

in the lair of the larks, in the dark of a moor
in the tale of a wraith with a phantom – or four
is a plot in a hole with a toad ‘n’ a mole
as the partridges crow & the peregrine soar

in the den of a then, in the when of a now
with the moo of a ewe ‘n’ the baa of a cow
with a dog of a bark – or a snarling of snark
is a vegetable man with a pen as a plough

in the scatters of splat, in the scribbles of sleep
on the trough of peak ‘n’ the top of the deep
is the whispering din of a hymn in a spin
in the land of the ram, in the kingdom of sheep

them of s & m

~

them of s & m ( m & s fo meht )

keep a watchful eye
on the ones that banged the pots

put up banners, bunting
& waved their munting flags

those of twitching curtains
covid as jehovah

wanking with the doom
on the six o’clock snooze

happy in their muzzle-mask
gleeful little gimps

them of s & m
grassing up the wrong’uns

worshipping key workers
( keys can open or lock doors )

useful fleas & fodder
troopers of the gloom

busybody flesh-bots
seeking praise of others

squirming worms in tins
irksome village quislings

pillars of community
means pillocks of
the weasel wood

dead in all but paperwork

fred west lives
under their patio

go fragment yourself

~

go fragment yourself ( flesruoy tnemgarf og )

hepatitis bumblebees
buzz a sea shanty

barracuda troubadours
buzzards up above

be the three in binary
diametric sweats

turtlenecks & ducking doves
all you need is glove

supper’s in the oven, love
like a turning shrew

screw the flaky gravy skin
fuck the custard’s crust

may contain nuts in may
escalator – esque

best before the trojan war
scrawl the way home

the warm-up man

~

the warm-up man ( nam pu-mraw eht )


one pale odd-bod

new moon boots

ten pairs of socks

fifteen tracky-beez

eight lucky underpants

four boxer shorts

five thermal vests

seven zipped hoodies

nine pairs of mittens

three yeti fur coats

scarves upon scarves

& a woollen bobble hat

waddles out the door

seeking higher ground

up a fruzzen hillock

’til the pillock sweats

( gotcha )

candlemas wax

~

candlemas wax ( xaw samweldnac )

once anon upon a swan
singing in the spinning yon
as the crawling, yawning dew
shines away the night

cycles in the snorting air
rocking like a horsing chair
yet the flapping phantom flu
sucks us in the shite

yesterday is rain again
chase a tracing paper plane
catch a dancing kangaroo
all the daze a blur

bouncing on the thawing ground
balls of orblets sprawl around
springs within y’ shuffled shoe
as the catkins purr

& the gormless normalzzz falls
teeter, topple weasel walls
paddles in the annal’s pooh
flee this tangled web

riddle in the twisting mist
scribble little piffle lists
music is the mutant glue
things t’do in feb

limbo bingo

~

limbo bingo ( ognib obmil )


unsung songbirds
tungsten tongues

lumps in the gravy
two fat ladies

torn-up paper planes
beetles pushing dung

storms at sea
in a cup of morning tea

pan is alive but
still playing possum

gravel in me moon boots
shoots – but no fruits

tumbleweed high streets
bumblebee zeds

pebbles on a riverbed
blithers in the head

blethers in the heather though
trombone undertones

dogs in the wrong wood
shoulda woulda could

rocking horses snore so
plod the foggy moorland

four jackdaws
& a cow brown grouse

– house ( ! )