This little piggy went to market,
this little piggy stayed at home,
this little piggy 
looked a little looked a little bit like Stephen Gately
so he replaced him
as the 5th member
of Boyzone
(on their reunion tour
run for the moors...)

This little piggy swam with dolphins
& narwhals (both species)
& rode on the back of a giraffe,
this little piggy went back in time
with a joke
& cheered up Sylvia Plath
(briefly)

& this little Piggy moved to Bradford
& got a job working in his local Costco,
he was doing alright for himself
until he bumped into his local serial killer
& then he got done in by a crossbow...

(The End)