~

dreaming of sweden ( nredewds fo gnimaerd )

…

i’m dreaming of sweden
whilst eating ryvita
the land of ikea
of blondes & long summers
of forests & saunas
with winters of darkness
but england is darker
& britain is sinking
the nordics are calling
europa is falling
& earth’s in the clutches
of globalist quislings
& pantomime horseplay
so flee east of norway
as ace of base, abba
& stockholm – her syndromes
are chirping like hatchlings
i listen & harken
the garden’s in tangles
with thorns on the brambles
the cure is far worser
a scourge of a killer
as curtains are twitching
& tossers bang pots
the plot is all rotten
the dross at the bottom
so come & run, reader
& leg it with me
we’ll peg from the sniffles
& fuck this scamdemic
bee free from the sheeple
& wankers in masks
…

~

catatonic crow ( worc cinotatac )

…

thunder under rain
staggers in y’ anorak
clatter cabbage brain

wobble on & laugh
cauliflower power trips
tossers block the path

intermittent owl
mutant moons of jupiter
as the brambles growl

squiggles squid the nib
curtain twitchers curdle cream
skirt around the fib

weasel breezes blow
speckle spectred spectrograph
catatonic crow

flutter bumblebee
spread it like a butterfly
mumbles jumble me
…

~

fare thee well ( llew eeht eraf )

…

it’s time to ride the diamond turnip

pie above the turtle doves

flying in the ocean’s lotions

scratch another cannonball

swan beyond the otter’s porridge

grease the knees of eventide

chase the changeling’s mutant poodle

smoothly – like a slimy lamprey

– shake the milky way

…

~

a conker fell ( llef reknoc a )

…

a conker fell upon the path

a feather & a leaf

upon the soft & sodden ground

– the lightness of a thief

& ponder i upon a plod

is this a sort of nod?

a mirror land of sinking sand

a portent & a sod

a bugger of the rectal rim

a spanner up the arse

a bounder of a bouncing bean

until the green is sparse

the roundabouts of out again

with knickers in a spin

a vernal verse – but in reverse

the cousin of begin

& kiss the twists of sylphid mist

a wraith upon the vale

a leper of a letterbox

& brush the foxes’ tail

as breezes blow & weasels crow

& thickets disappear

a conker fell upon the path

& so the bend is here

( oh, bollocks )

…

~

yesterday is tomorrow’s today ( yadot s’worromot si yadretsey )

…

then fledgling phoenixes

stage left & right turn

them from the ashes

of another dry ice age

breathe like a bicycle

fly like a mole

bite the bullet’s hole

before the trigger is triggered

time is like octopuses

on a bouncy castle

dodge the phantom rain clouds

hiding in the sun’s shine

tudor computers

neolithic portals

yawns of a morning

sleeping ’til the evening

so, robotic romans

saturn spins both ways

spanners, anvils, calendars

circles, whirrs & banisters

hammers, hammocks, kippers red

hamsters haddock in the head

easter was a phantom land

& bring your own sandwiches

…

~

piss another proem  (  meorp rehtona ssip  )

…

once upon a yarn

underneath the moon

as the badgers barked

with the village loon

so the annals wrote

in amongst the dross

when the spectres float

& the bishops toss

turning circled sleep

over once again

in the middle’s mist

mizzle is the rain

mares within the air

retribution’s now

butchers dreamt a death

eaten by a cow

bakers burnt the cakes

poets kissed the stars

venus sings – begin

jupiter & mars

hark, the howl of owls

& the scribbles pen

once upon a yarn

something happened then

…

~

flimflamdemia fatigue  (  eugitaf aimedmalfmilf  )

…

asses ‘n’ gasses ‘n’ muzzle the masses

sing in a spin of the onions in pickles

eagles in trusses & sheeple on busses

larks in the garden – a shit in the thistles

weasels deceiving as beetles are heaving

dung in a dungeon, the rubber of riddles

puppets in pockets & lizards in lockets

muppets are lapping the pap of the piffles

piss in the papers – the barrels, the scrapers

lions not liars – the pricks in the middles

tossers are turning, the blither is burning

earth in a flap with a touch of the sniffles

( oh no )

…

( author notes )

” worse things happen at sea, you know “

( eric idle )

…