“health” & “safety” is bigger than jesus (nowadays )

“a tyranny sincerely exercised for the good of its victims may be the most oppressive.

it would be better to be under robber barons than under omnipotent moral busybodies”

c.s lewis

the mud beneath


the mud beneath ( htaeneb dum eht )

the mud beneath’s a sodden bog
a cloak of oak, a croaking log

the mizzled mist is missing sheep
a dragon snores & all is sleep

the deep is up, the south is north
the east is west, the back is forth

a feather falls – but falls from where?
your mother’s face, a leveret hare

the twisting shapes, a dip, a dive
a spooling ghoul, the air’s alive

the scattered land is sleeping cloud
the taj mahal, the turin shroud

a circle spins a string of yarn
a distant screech, a secret barn

& all is balls, a yawning day
the pastures pant, the grass is grey

a sunken see, the squinting sands
the seasons jazz with phantom hands

the mud beneath’s a sodden bog
a plod within the morning’s fog

doe ray me poem


doe ray me poem ( meop em yar eod )

so rainy
piss upon the pissed upon
’til the fucker dries

though maybe
all is not a knotted ball
as the crocus flies

oh, daisy
ride ‘er like a bicycle
lilting lullabies

blow hazy
spin it like a weather vane
scatter whats ‘n’ whys

milfs milk men
mercury is monkey me
whistle, winter wren

sing ’til then
ink within y’ blizzard brain
scribble with a pen

glow, grey bee
bumble in this in between
minstrels mincing pies

doe ray me
cut the crap ‘n’ zap attack
with y’ laser eyes

the things we hear


the things we hear ( raeh ew sgniht eht )

bamboo shoots

up like rhubarb

lost flock baa’s

garden gnomes & statues

singing filthy hymns

static on the radio

laughter in the loft

fates down the bingo

playing for a full house

fishwives wittering

pssst, kung pao

plughole gurgles

faces in the clouds

sneezing on the ground

lapwings or peewits

kettles whistle winds

telephones knelling

like a funerary bellend

fried egg crackle’s

like cladding on a new build

come mid-june

when the scarecrows are swearing

trudging on snow

so the planets realign

twats banging pots

wasps indoors

sunny days in dark socks

– fuckin’ alarm clocks

a skein is seen


a skein is seen ( nees si nieks a )

autumn’s auspecies

greylags in gaggles

pale or dark bellied

brent from the arctic

like a latin five

marvel at the barnacles

pink footed, tundra

honking on the wind

first is the sound

older than the gold

of a younger, brighter saturn

rasping in the clouds

so we stop & watch

eyes looking skyward

over dead clover

as the mosses green

victory & peace

singing like a symbol

flapping fowl fingers

shades of harvey smith

vees above the trees

geese on a mission

swears up in the air

– up yours ‘n’ all

definitions of a poems


definitions of a poems ( smeop a fo snoitinifed )

the journal squirms of dead old men

& spinsters with cobwebs for knickers

the gruel of school, designed to bore

the speak of sleep – & so we snored

with purple spurts & shapes of beige

an open toad upon a page

that no one reads, a dull-de-sac

a sack of shit, a bag of cack

or magic beans for cabbage folk

a cattle prod, an egg, a yoke

a floating ghost or cheese on toast

the tapered tones of nature’s notes

a sort of door, a funky key

the apes & scrapes of monkey me

a letter stuck with music’s glue

( parcelled to parts unknown )

the gaps between the cracks in clouds

a scribble in – & out the other

a shooting star of trar-luh-lar

the lucid dreams of prose in a coma

the twisted lists of brevity’s rants

the ants in pantomime’s pants

the life & times of baa, baa, baa

rhyming, if inclined

& shining like a shining thing

in the can ( & out the other )


in the can ( & out the other ) ( ( rehto eht tuo & ) nac eht ni )


in the can be mushy peas

prunes with stones

& gloopy custard


squirming worms & earthen holes

morning skies

like golden syrup


water for the garden gnomes

cannon balls

as cavalry canter


in the can be canticles


& candlemas eve


can’s a tin & tin’s a drum

hark, the music

– can you see?


in the can be other cans

kicking cans

& dancing the cancan