target audience

~

target audience ( ecneidua tegrat )

…

trampolinists
with vertigo
& motion sickness

lollipop ladies
with two glass eyes
& narcolepsy

fellow subscribers
of fillipino welder
& eskimo tea lady monthly

minstrels ‘n’ nymphs
fit nuns & ninjas
( even if they’re ginger )

village weirdos
with hairy palms
who talk to the faerie folk

those who dance the blues
in dyspraxia shoes
& mermaids with barnacle beards

hardcore insomniacs
with bags beneath bags
who spot the shooting stars

snarks on the park
pissing in the dark
as the normalzzz snore

plodders of the leas
not those n.p.c’s
with their woe is me poetry

all the non-bots
who see beyond the gaps
of the dot-dot-dots

…

kumquat may

~

kumquat may ( yam tauqmuk )

…

in the fourteenth century
up a walnut tree

enter seven digit code
hit the bloody road

salad is a ballad
flap another fragment

facing the brace
of a fresh west wind

down with the owls
in a hooded oaken wood

with a rusty spanner
& a jelly baby sandwich

my middle name
was never craig or gordon

i preferred your early work
when the earth was purple

…

internet storm warning

~

internet storm warning ( gninraw morts tenretni )

…

masts on the moor

( scaring off crows )

rattle like trees

( kids play with snakes )

drumming the rain

( falling indoors )

i spy my my

( weathercock eye )

so & so strayed

( from the wrong path )

so & so said

( something or other )

then echoes flow

( pissing upstream )

redder than herrings

( brainstream spools )

as the bloody bots

( flesh & the code )

stir the phantom potty

( plastic & cracked )

for all who swim in

( run a hot bath )

read a good book

( hashtag s.o.s )

…

promo poem

~

promo poem ( meop omorp )

…

grown under moonlight
made in cydonia

voted number one
by tea leaf readers

& lollipop ladies
who gave us five stars

each unique barcode
was jazz hand carved

ten percent of florists
found the secret passage

three in four badgers
never saw it coming

also available
in yellow or magenta

or dark matter
but good luck with that

six in seven shepherds
loved it like their flock

all organic
even the tentacles

typed over time
by a trillion chimps

brewed in a vat
with tramp underpants

under warranty
’til the end of the holocene

unconfused
despite the kali yuga

ten thousand barn owls
can’t be bloody wrong

eighty eight percent of goblins
said it was delicious

…

pen forth, penfriends

~

pen forth, penfriends ( sdneirfnep ,htrof nep )

…

rollerball buddies
tossers of the daily sprawl
sponsored by posca

black marker partners
paper white – like elephants
singing with a wrist

calligraphy cohorts
bullet tip associates
on the ballpoint boys

highlighter fishwife’s
& fountain pen mountain men
scrawling like spiders

feathered quill brethren
sisters of the squidy well
stilo amigos

we, the scribble’s kin
irkers of the qwerty keys
writing like a ghost

…

pardon?

~

pardon? ( ?nodrap )

…

where are my car keys?
– quarter past seven

can you smell gas?
– sticky toffee pudding

what time’s kick off?
– the sea of tranquility

do you take sugar?
– nought point five

will it rain later?
– fire salamanders

do you know your postcode?
– long john silver

have you lost some weight?
– six clarinets

cash or card?
– probably osmosis

when’s the next bus?
– sunny side up, please

is there a god?
– try the airing cupboard

have you fed the dog?
– the royal albert hall

is this a poem?
– bicarbonate of soda

…

exit plandemic

~

exit plandemic ( cimednalp tixe )

…

middle afternoons

drinking flat pop

      from a plastic beaker

      as the ‘rona fizzles

lo, a bridge aflame

see the normalzzz turn

      even snooze readers

      & children of the kool aid

but some muzzled cling

drooling for the bell

      hardcore zealots

      lost in their masada

walk beyond the song

of a winter swan

      don’t excuse the mess

      of this dress rehearsal

finches summon spring

singing waterloo

      as clouds gather

      on a hillock’s brow

so the future spools

fodder for the ghouls

      wear a beige raincoat

      & green jackboots

…