~

alternative names for the moon ( noom eht rof seman evitanretla )

…

cousin of the sun

david niven’s balloon

cheeky, cheesy chops

fodder of space-mice

old crater face

dean martin’s pizza

nephew of the death star

werewolf activator

mistress of up there

renfield amplifier

lover of the lunatics

shaper of the dreamscape

shooter of beams

master of the tides

as the midges bite

warden of the night

…

( author notes )

& i’ve heard word – from a reliable source

that the actor, comedian

& game show host – les dennis

is in fact … a straight man

( gasp )

apparently dennis used to be married

to that amanda holden – & all sorts

& she’s not a les

she’s an amanda instead

( another gasp )

so dennis has been fooling us all

since at least the fucking eighties

( it’s an absolute swizz )

…