number two

~

number two ( owt rebmun )

…

the quantum quack
of one little duck

is albarn’s woo-hoo
in a pair of goody shoes

where half of zero
or peas in a pea pod

if pennies or cents
are rubbing together

then double is nothing
ballerina desmond

cyphers crackle
turtle doves sing

tango takes
helium’s place

echoing back
like a magic mallard

blake realises
the old man is a thistle

twinned with mirror’s
like duality’s digit

geminis measure
the thickness of short planks

as a bactrian hump
is fibonacci’s dump

…

the continuing adventures of betty swollocks

~

the continuing adventures of betty swollocks ( skcollows ytteb fo serutnevda gniunitnoc eht )

…

now’s the toast of roasting nuts
trousers whiffing more than guts

walking on a browning lea
formerly a shade of pea

dreaming of the gift of rain
bursting on a thirsting plain

droplets dripping from the bonce
sweating like an effing nonce

hunter group on telegram
knot a clue – the heavens slam

when the blue’s a hue of hell
wickets still – a stinking bell

wash again yet still she calls
singing songs of sodden balls

under heaving heaps of sky
she beneath is back in i

…

r i v e r s

~

r i v e r s ( s r e v i r )

…

r ow y’ boat upon

      raspberries ‘n’ onward thee

      ripple as y’ go

i n between daydreams

      is the realm of kingfishers

      idle like the flow

v oyage on the clear

      view the future through the cracks

      visions reappear

e nvoy of the dry

      earth’s submerged emissary

      egrets dwelleth here

r eeds beneath the glass

      roaches, pikes ‘n’ sticklebacks

      rubber duckies quack

s eeking seabound sounds

      sing below the grassy banks

      so she singeth back

…

dog this

~

dog this ( siht god )

…

dogwood tree
beg for a biscuit

doggerel verse smith
pee up a lamp post

dog eared scribbles
– go to your bed

doghouse builder
growling at the postman

dogfish mongers
chasing squirrels in the park

dog days of summer
come here & sit

salty sea dog
jump for your ball

dog star rising
fetch me my slippers

…

bravo …

~

bravo … ( … ovarb )

…

& the last poet
on that night
had nits

as the bright lights flickered
& the microphone cracked

& the last poet
on that night
had nits

when the full moon bloomed
then a dead duck quacked

& the last poet
on that night
had nits

ruffles on their scalp
where the parasites attacked

& the last poet
on that night
had nits

scratching along
with the head lice act

…

onion poem

~

onion poem ( meop noino )

…

bulbous provider
pickled or spring
layers of flavour
lord of the ring

rounded ‘n’ grounded
king of the loop
spanish if massive
french if a soup

master of salads
grow in a row
courter of cheeses
veg’ in the know

rhymer of bunion
guzzle ’em down
reddish in places
greener or brown

soul of a coleslaw
dice her ‘n’ fry
smile when it’s raining
drops from the eye

pungent companion
over the years
savoury’s saviour
bringer of tears

…

( author notes )

& the last poet on had nits

( they were the headlice act )

…

how to cure constipation

~

how to cure constipation ( noitapitsnoc eruc ot woh )

…

drink a glass of water

ride on a log flume

under blooming moons

eat a tin of prunes

or snooker balls

especially the greens

nestle on your throne

singing god save the queen

pogo in loose clothing

over sleeping policeman

play peekaboo

with yourself – in the mirror

spot the horse manure

& see bluebottles dine

or just write a poem

& dump the deed online

…

( author notes )

for those that don’t know
a sleeping policeman
is actually a speed bump
& not a copper
having a nap on the road
– it’s just a silly name

p.s

constipation is an anagram

of titanic spoon

…