Poems

the first

~

the first  (  a  s h i t e  p o e m  )

…




somewhere an ill wind blows their nose

my secret elbow hums a tune

whilst sheep they sleep & cows bulldoze

whilst badgers bask & harps harpoon


the fields feel fine, the river's low

the sky above's in pantaloons

as sure as how's garden does grow

whilst foxes trot & swallows swoon


a door is born - the keys transpose

again - once more as sure as prunes

plus bats means shat as we all know

meanwhile an elm tree gently croons

( ' it's june ' )

...

the fly indoors

~

the fly indoors  (  a  t r u e  s t o r y  )

…



the fly indoors remains indoors

from room to room, from floor to floor

it bumbles on throughout this house

outside the world waits - unexplored


the window's smashed so you could go

to paris, hull or tokyo

i tell said fly - i need not lie

follow that breeze which sweetly blows


instead there's buzz & buzz again

as all is buzz-buzz in my brain

plus buzz & buzz & buzz & buzz

plus buzz, plus buzz - it's been decades


or so things seem, once more i groan

then cry - oh fly, please leave this home

or i'll make soup then thou may drown

oh fuck off fly - leave me

alone

...

( my other poems )

~

( my other poems )  (  a n  e x c u s e  n o t  a n  a p o l o g y  )

…



( my other poems )

are scatter-brained birds

( my other poems )

have returned to the earth

( my other poems )

are flowers on the dead

( my other poems )

shat shit on your head


( watch y'self )

...

fifteen things to do ( today ! )

~

fifteen things to do today ( today ! ) ( by franz joseph list )

…


one - save the hedge

two - save the hog

three - save the hedgehog

four - walk that dog

five - blow your nose

six - who needs them?

seven - ( extempore )

eight - straighten bends

nine - do not kill

ten - mind the gaps

eleven - eat well

twelve - take a nap

thirteen - then wake

fourteen - scratch head

fifteen - rise & shite

then back to bed

...

stern gales in storm drains

~

stern gales in storm drains  (  a  ?  (  ?  )  )

…






there's stern gales in storm drains

& judges in wigs

there's branches called russell

so then

something twigs


fire engines when it rains

with shite siren song

cat burglars stuck up trees

so let's

wander on


- look, judas on burnt toast

he's winking - the scamp

plus bees in yon bonnet

as barns

start to dance


there's presence in present

& past in its tense

there's jigsaws & piss-takes

yes

far too much sense

...

dog roses

~

dog roses  (  a n o t h e r  r o s e  p o e m  a p p a r e n t l y  . . .  ?  )

…





dog roses won't fetch your slippers

bark up wrong trees, catch a ball

dig a hole or be taught new tricks

young or old

no, not at all


dog roses don't eat your homework

piss-up lamp posts, shat on streets

dog roses - a hedgerow's best friend

come the rain

they smell so sweet

...

a is for ample

~

a is for ample  (  a  p o e m  )

…



a is for ample

there's anthills

& anvils


armpits, ale, adders

attackers

acanthus


ambience - achoo

asked askew

& ado


arduous amour

aah, adore

aargh - abhor


a is for anus

articulate

aimless


alchemy actually

absently

affably


amber, alkaline

amalgams

& alpine


anything addles

so why stop

at apple

( ? )

...

foiled again

~

foiled again  (  a  p o e t r y  )

…


your town's gone brown

your full has stopped

your team's gone down

your clogs

have clogged


your pop has burst

your mud is caked

your weasel's cursed

your spud

has baked


your spoons have flown

your end has mooned

your wind has blown

your doom

has bloomed


so wear that hat

prance in the rain

oh bastard drat

all's

foiled again

...