…
conkers, conkers, conkers
carpal tunnel vision
a mute town crier
half a jar of bovril
cobweb sandwiches
ging gang goolie ghouls
( undead scouts )
rain clouds wazzing down
life on iapetus
titus oates’s porridge
the madness of fog
& pumpkin flavoured coffees
( why, why, why… ? )
a unicorn’s shoe
a two pence piece
nefertiti’s neckline
a branch of fallen hawthorn
( as a makeshift broom )
your own unique barcode
doctor pepper’s stethoscope
mister kipling’s chinstrap
parsnips et cetera
…
…
of course the nights draw in
but the lights get brighter
as joggers with headlamps
huffing like tupped ewes
startle us blind
leaves on the lawn
form a sort of jigsaw
on ungreening grass
still one oak leaf short
of a puzzled face emoji
while the ghosts are ghosting
& fireworks shell
offensive like the somme
& muppets sweep backyards
in uneven piles
change & effing cliché
are the only constants
count the clouds & see
one, two, triple three
– summer does not compute
so a khaos protocol
anorak not jacket
wellys not training
tweaking when the squirrel folk
gather them acorns
…
…
pile cream
the financial times
vaseline
chocolate hobnobs
ten pence plastic bag
…
…
milk on the turn
maybe a gale
tartan tea towels
an out-of-tune kazoo
two mandarin ducks
postcards from mars
custard creams & hobnobs
a robot penfriend
hopefully sunshine
denser bones
& spring by november
…
…
crunchy peanut butter
three silver bullets left
toe nail clippings
a pheasant feather boa
two waxwings
a waxing gibbous
odd socks again
rain by five
twenty trombonists
eighty eight cobwebs
hashtag doggerland
…
…
blue between grey
lumbago again
apple juice bladder
six carrion crows
should have bought batteries
all but ten across
codeword sorted though
a handful of dates
two missed calls
no death threats
& a big bowl of cornflakes
…
…
september, september
soap sud flakes
eight fat ladies
fish paste sandwiches
september, september
bailing twine laces
time for reflection
your anus in a puddle
september, september
the ombudsman’s chin
a mastiff of mole hills
plus v.a.t
september, september
almost maroon
& yet tangerine
the bishop’s new pubes
september, september
solvent-free glue
deep green anorak
the second punic war
september, september
an anderson shelter
breakfast in a bath tub
& rose hip hedgerows
…
…
who?
saint swithun
where?
the derbion, derby
when?
last tuesday afternoon
why?
to buy some thermal socks
how?
with magic beans
…
…
avocado
bobbins
catkin
doggerel
epithet
foghorn
galanthus
haiku
idyll
junket
kipper
lanyard
michaelmas
nymph
oxytocin
pencil
quango
rhubarb
sylphic
typo
u-bend
vole
wanker
xanadu
yeti
ziggurat
…
…
air in a hurry
gusts in a huffy rush
the nobody that frisks us all
even monkish nuns
the to & the fro
of this cosmic egg in flow
currents over seas
the never ending sneezes
east then west
poltergeist-esque
the wheezes & the whispers
of sylphid country cousins
why the flag dances
& slates fly off roofs
why leaves scatter
& hats leave heads
the breezes & the gales
in mister beaufort’s scale
is a scentless flatulence
from the gods’ bottoms
who never follow through
just spin mills
…
resarf poetry 