…

as of last wednesday
as unseen on t.v

available in hardback
as per the shame-fest

plug as in – in
one for the tossers

part of a series
that hardly bloody anyone

will bother their socks
or biscuits for – it’s

baked to imperfection
but we’ve all swallowed worse

said the famous soap actress
to the camp t.v chef

so open to suggestions
like the gap between the train

& the chockablock platform
heading to your bargain bin

not big in japan
but banned in parts of luxemburg

more than just a barcode
hardly a seven

in deep green or grey
may contain nuts

best before six whitsuns since
god save the parsnip

…